p for paradox.

"I'M SIGNIFICANT!!!…screamed the dust speck."

Archive for the category “Purely Professional”

cuppa koffie.

Every morning a new hope dawns upon my caffeine buds. A new ray of optimism, that something rewarding, something pure will run down that machine.

But then, hope is a dangerous thing after all. The vending machine, howsoever jazzy it is in my department, with those oh-so-designer paper cups falling elegantly to a touch screen command – still falls short of expectations. An exciting cuppa koffie at sharp 8 AM is so so imperative to kick start the day. To build up a pier of faith in yourself – that I deserve this!

But no, its a humble morning as always. I agree with the dude who thought expectations are preconceived resentments. I have started focusing on lowering any prospects that might even hint towards hoping for a better koffie from that dark machine. I call it Expectations Evaporation. I think I’l file a patent for this term. Sounds cool.

The most challenging part is that the number of koffies I have per day is directly proportional to the number of meetings. You just pulled a chair to initiate a random process discussion or maybe just took off the cap of the colorful marker to start off with some arbitrary graphs on the white board and you hear the fellow – “koffie? koffie?” Wow! another one? I just had 2 in the last hour. Two half hour meetings you see. But no, I won’t give in. It can’t be rude trying to save your exclusive caffeine tracks from the not-so favorable not-so-java hot beverage!

“Nee, dank u well.” I say

“Soup then?” comes the follow up question.

“Ummm….No, not really.” [A chill runs down my spine thinking of the tomato puree mixed with some sort of milk powder]

“Warme chocolade maybe?”

“Noooo!!” [I miss bournvita]

“Ok, lets start off with the meeting then”

“NO!!..uH, YES, Sure” [Finally]

And a few chitchats till a similar conversation is initiated yet again, an hour later. The stage is different, the characters have changed…but the plot remains the same…

Sometimes I miss the chai wala at the thela outside the G office back home. I mean, I miss that chai. The one he must be still warming in that vessel he washed a decade back. It had its own charm. I think it was circumstantial too. Those moments were synonymous with what I call chimney chats – just vent out, let the smoke out. Can be about work or the boss or the not-so-much-of-a boss, or about love of food. Anything. It doesn’t happen here. Its a different bonding at this place. For instance its my tacit turn now to grab that cost saving cup holder, stroll around the corridoor, peep into each room and ask ‘wilt u drinken?’Wat?’

Its a healthy to-do. Atleast for mingling around. Anyways, here I come Mr. Vending. Nothing is permanent, you will also change, one fine day.

dilbert goes dutch

‘Commisioning’ a blog on a Friday morning is both good and bad. A strong reflection of both happy and a sad. I am a bit late than usual to my desk today. It’s normally time for my 3rd cuppa zwart koffie now but thanks to my 10 yr old given for an overhaul, I was dependent on the meander duo. They are cool, but their day starts a bit late 🙂

And well, my 10 yr old is the Volkswagen Golf here.

Being a Dilbert fan is both constructive and challenging. Wally, Dogbert, Alice but just a few Asoks…all are dawdling around as I write this post. The good thing is that I see humour is almost everything. The pointy haired manager is actually quite good-looking, and pretty cool. I have just started in this new role so I think I can be nice to him. My ‘boss’ however, is the red jacketed superwoman. I don’t see her very often, but I know she cares a lot for me. A young dynamic girl, away from her family, her BF, her friends, her country (that’s me not her), I gain empathy points straightaway! 😀 But yes, without putting logic to it, she is nice to me.

Catbert is literally jumping around, not sure if its excitement or nervousness. The point is that a few days back, he was asked to leave the organisation as per one of his own cost cutting programs [hah hah!!]. The data crunching and analysis for this program was done by me. But in no way do I hold myself responsible for his release. I swear I tried to warn him what the result could lead to. So you see, some days you are the pigeon and some days you are the statue. So thanks to a dilbertness in my blood, my day goes on super entertaining. The 8am-4pm colleagues, well, who are totally warm and cordial and mostly on holidays, are making it an endurable stint for me. It’s going to be one complete year soon. In the land of tulips and cheese and canals and windmills, and well, legal weed.

The problem is, when I am the only one who finds everything funny.

It feels everyone is slower than a herd of turtles cycling through peanut butter. And then the turtles will go on a vacation soon. #NeedSpeedInLife 🙂

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